So now that the summer is over,
and wedding planning and wedding itself is over...
I embark on the rest of my life!!!
Which has come with alot of changes and alot of adjustments, alot of surprises!
As we had to move, have a wedding, a surprise pregnancy, work and school...
Oh September!
MOVING
While wedding planning, we also had to pack and move because our lease was up at our 1bdrm suite. It was a small place and not near any public transit for me. As I do not have a drivers licence STILL...I need to be on a bus route. Had enough of spending so much money on cabs all the time.
So among the planning and the work etc had to find a place and pack and move by August 1st. We were incredibly lucky to find the first place we actually physically went to look at! A 2bdrm/2bath ground floor corner unit condo! Right within walking distance to EVERYTHING! And our fantastic new landlord also offered for us to move in 2 weeks early for rent free! Just to take some of the stress off instead of moving 10 days before our wedding day, it gave us almost a month to settle in before the big wedding day.
We finally have a garborator, I cant tell you how amazing that thing is!
PREGNANCY
The night before moving day we were suspecting we may be pregnant...as I was 2weeks late, and also the time before that was a week late and barely a cycle at all. Thought maybe its with so much going on, its putting my body and system out of whack.
So took a home pregnancy test and positive!!! Didn't have to lift a thing moving!
So we went to bed in a daze but very happy.
Now...first it was a little hard to get all excited about it because we miscarried back in 2008. It really devastated us even though we didn't recognise it right away. It wasn't until we had a rough patch and separated for a few months in 2010...that it was something we talked about again. And man oh man when we did we both cried a river. My husband didn't express alot of emotions in 2008 when it happened. It was kind of a blur. But during our split, it all came out. We spent quite some time as friends and working through all the pain we silently endured as individuals. Explored ourselves emotionally on a whole new level. Incredible. It may have been what brought us closer again.
So with this pregnancy my tummy has got itchy alot, using bio oil and noticing hair around my belly button haha and my leg hairs grow faster than weeds! I am thinking of waxing instead of shaving cuz this is just torture!
Morning sickness isn't too too bad, it comes and goes. I sleep ok at night, not as tired during the day as I was in the beginning. Other than I still pee alot during the night, I wake up feeling like omg im going to explode I cant move! Ha
Things I now HATE:
1) Very sensitive to bread...I swear I tossed lots thinking its mouldy, if it doesn't taste fresh out of an oven I cant eat it. Other than that I love bread...from Cobbs!
2) The smell of the BBQ, and charcoal black burnt on my meat yuk!
3) Extra old cheddar (was my fav not no more)
4) Not a fan no more of hot coffee, only ice capps
5) the smell of meat cooking, smell of noodles cooking, smell of mushrooms cooking...
6) Smell of raw meat in a butcher shop
7) Mayonnaise
Things I now LOVE
1) Iced Tea!!
2) Fish & Chips with coleslaw and tarter sauce
3) Hot dogs from Orange Julius only
4) BLT bagels from tim hortons, half mayo tho
5) Chai tea
6) Slurpees & Ice capps
7) Apple sauce
We heard the heart beat at our second midwife appointment, then saw the baby at our first ultrasound August 8th ...we were 10 weeks and 3 days along, Due March 4th 2013.
WEDDING/MARRIAGE
Now at first this all of a sudden hit me like a ton of bricks and with pregnancy hormones I was happy and excited one day, then an emotional mess the next, with anxiety of all the changes and feeling like I had to be so much more than I am. Felt low self esteem, like how can I be a house wife when all I do now is sleep or puke I don't wanna cook or clean. All of a sudden my husband became a wife and I became anything but! Thank goodness for him, hes amazing!
Most women feel this way and feel ashamed, but most important is to talk about it! Everything feels the same on some levels. At the same time it feels like you go from a relationship to a marriage and its like going from having something breakable you can recycle it and replace to a marriage where it becomes a rare valuable piece of crystal or a one of a kind diamond, and if you drop it or lose it...its a big deal! There's no turning back! You treasure and cherish this one thing, and the thought of anything ever damaging it or losing it causes so much anxiety you can break down out of nowhere. You want it forever, never to lose it or have it break. You go from holding a piece of glass to holding a piece of crystal.
I cant dwell on the anxiety of now I have something so much more precious to maintain. I'm ready for it...just have hormones that make me over think and panic some moments.
I know I'm not the only one!
So far we agree to disagree if and when needed and are always looking after each other ha ha, and I give more back rubs, and he cooks more and likes to stay home. When I am emotional, he is my security blanket and my rock. He brings me water in the middle of the night, and sets the table for me at dinner and makes me feel special. Then once in awhile he does something I find 100% inconsiderate and selfish and all hell breaks loose in pregnant land (like putting raw chicken package in the kitchen garbage can with no gargabe bag in it)...but all is well! I have to hold aside the hormones and play it cool...
WORK/SCHOOL
As I seem to only get part time work, and have alot of time on my hands...and during pregnancy I should stay focused on myself...I have enrolled in school!
Mondays and Wednesdays I take Biology 12 in the mornings. Tuesday and Thursdays I take Math in the afternoons. I am having a baby and now is the time, now or never...to finish up my education so I have my pre-requisites for college! I need better marks and I need to refresh my pregnancy brain on basic skills again.
Then I work evenings and weekends whenever, it fluctuates on a weekly basis. Then Mat leave until I can end up going back for evenings a little earlier than expected.
So far after my first week of being back into school, it seems interesting and pretty easy so far, phew! Bought a new desk with a filing drawer and 2 drawers...need to get a chair and set up office in soon to be nursery, do focus on homework!
First semester before baby is due, ill be taking these 2 courses in class, then second semester when baby should arrive, ill be doing English 12 online from home, and Math in class Wednesday evenings while hubby stays home with baby.
I will need to invest in either a breast pump, or alot of formula. Hoping for a breast pump.
For the next 6 months...I am going to be busy!
